somethings about today.

there are two things. well there are actually lots of things. because for some reason i always seem to have stuff i can write and talk about...but mostly today there are two things that are most important for sharing.

i'm not sure which one i should start with so i will start with the fancy one...and end with the meaningful one.

the fancy one is the thing i am drinking my new obsession from. ok...i know...yesterday i said i was obsessed with rubix. and i am. still...but you are allowed to have more than one obsession and my other one is this thing called tea...specifically "to life" tea...a way too expensive habit for my poor ass...kind of like getting my hair cut and colored...but it makes me happy, and being happy is most important...so it's whatever. anyway "to life" is delicious its from teavana at washington square, go there, learn about it, and become obsessed. it will change your life. but the point is that my coworkers were gone yesterday in LA and they brought me back a fancy present for my new obsession. they brought me back a mug to drink out of...and not just any mug but a high school musical mug.

look...
the front...

the back...


franz bread, one of our clients has partnered with disney to do a big high school musical promotion and that means we get to have fun fancy things...like i get this gorgeous mug...we also have the soundtrack and the second movie...basically it's awesome.

the other important thing i need to talk about is my meaningful thing.

there has been this thing on my mind lately...pretty much constantly...and its all i have really been able to think about. and what's been the hardest thing about it all is there are not very many people in my life that i can talk to about it because not very many people understand. it's not something i can talk about at work, it's not something i can talk about at home, its not something i can talk about with my friends...because it involves a part of my life i don't share with any of those people...i'm being vague but mostly i'm writing for me right now...so feel free to not continue reading...the fancy part i already wrote about..and usually i dont use this place as my journal but today i am. because today is the day i finally feel i can take a breath...i can take a breath that is full of clean fresh air...not the air i have been breathing for the past several weeks...but new air...because things are better now. they are not all better...because this is one of those fabulous things that takes time...and because i am the worlds most impatient person (we are talking...if there is a problem i can't function normally until it is fixed...) time is hard for me to sit on...but it is a relief to know that things are finally pointing to the right direction...i have fallen off that frustrating grey cloud where there are no right answers...no right ways...and finally landed on a path where i can walk towards something that makes sense...i know it will take a few days, maybe weeks to get to the end of that path...but im walking, and that's what is important...

there are two songs i have on repeat right now...
1. Missy Higgins - "Special Two"
..."i remember someone old once said to me...that lies will lock you up with truth the only key...but i was comfortable and warm inside my shell...and couldn't see this place would soon become our hell...so is it better to tell on her or lie to save a face...well i guess the answer is don't do it in the first place..."
2. The Fray - "All at Once"
..."and all at once the crowd beings to say...sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are same..."

i've been vague in this but i have a point...and my point is...there are things in life that happen...and there are two roads to take after they do...the easy one...and the hard one...something about the hard one is that not very many people take it because not very many people are strong enough to. but i challenge you to grab on to someones hand and take the hard road...because together you can make it though and in the end that road will change you for the better. try not to get distracted by the decisions of everyone around you...because in the end there is only one person you can every truly control, and that is yourself. there will be obstacles and trials and things that make you question taking the hard way...but listen carefully for those moments and people that remind you that you are on the right track...because they are around...you are never alone. everything happens for a reason. nothing is an accident. take advantage of every opportunity for growth even the hard ones. be the change. it's worth it.