Tuesday, July 29, 2008


today is a good day. because i got a present.

so sometimes heather likes to buy me small presents. and her and julieanna were going to new seasons to buy lunch things and because i was doing stuff for portland clinic all morning i had to actually clock some hours behind the desk and play catch up...so she asked if we wanted a special treat...of course i said yes, cause i always want special treats.

so i say "bitch i live for special treats. learn about that."
she gave me a choice of edible kind or non edible kind...i told her non...and said that the special treat should be like the stretchy horses we got the day we bought seans b-day pie.

so guess what i got! you won't ever guess...but this shit is awesome and i am loving it!

that's right...RECORDERS!!! musical fancy hot pink special awesome recorder... also i got those sour patch kids...

heather loves me. and i love that recorder...and i'm going to learn to play that shit like its my job or something. live for it. it even comes with a cleaner stick.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

something important

well i tried to get a new favorite song added to my playlist...but the place i use on my music down there on the left hand side...didn't have the song...so i tried imeem...so do this fast...it is important.

go pause my regular playlist and then play my "something everyone should hear" imeem song...amazing grace...i thought it would be the whole thing...but it isn't...its just a clip. it is one of my favorite pianists...jim brickman and one of my favorite christian singers, ginny owens...and together this is gorgeous. this song is simply amazing.

i am having a hard day. a really hard day. this song is getting me through. i love that about music. sometimes when i am too exhausted to find words to pray...i just listen to the song and let it do the talking for me...in fact later...when i don't have to sit at my desk anymore i might just turn this song on and let it sing me to sleep...cause my eyes are sleepy. i am tired.

also 8 more days till sister comes home. and its getting to the point now were i just miss her. and because we are on the topic of her. wow, her being gone the past 5 weeks has really shown me that my life without her wouldn't be good. she helps me be who i am...i am not sure i could be me without her in my world...i don't think i know how...maybe for a little while...but i think i would forget who i was without her...

that is all...i am not making sense...mostly everyone just find this song, download it on itunes...create a playlist of it on imeem...i dont really care what you do as long as you are learning about it...because it's a good one.

and if anyone is handing out hugs today...find me...cause i could use about a thousand of them.

Monday, July 21, 2008


this is a screw.

this little beauty made me 1.5 hours late to work. normally i wouldn't mind a late start...sleep in a little. eat a delicious breakfast...but this morning wasn't a lounge type of morning...this morning i got to hang out here...

cause that piece of shit screw decided it would be a good idea to get stuck in my tire...and then make it go flat.

i am tired. i am annoyed. and i am sick of my car being a pain in my ass...that car better learn about getting its act together or i might machete it in half...and machetes are not the kinds of cuts to be messing with.

Monday, July 14, 2008

barbed wire cuts with a drip of blood.

last friday was nasty. it was ashley's last day...and i'm am not happy about this at all. i'm kind of angry actually. this morning i got to the office and hated that when i looked at her office she wasn't there and neither were any of her pictures. which basically means shes gone for reals. (although she left her miley cyrus poster on the wall...rude. i gave that to her special from tiger beat magazine. whatever.)

anyway last friday was a really fun day. even though it was her last...lets recap

we had office lunch at oba!

this is us girls driving to the restaurant. we are hella fancy. i basically love us...we are missing one girl. cause she was gone on honey moon adventures...which reminds me i need to post about heather's wedding cause it was basically one of the best times i have ever had!
anyway...here we are at lunch.

i am just posting the fancy side. mostly there were a lot of office people that went in fact lets recap one of the memorable moments...a moment that wasn't awkward at all...
julieanna - "(in a joking voice) well to celebrate ashley's last day lets go around and all say one nice thing about her! i will start...she has good hair!"
peter - "(missing the memo on it being a joke...and then taking it across the line...out the door...and across the fucking street.) i have one. ashley has great tits."


after lunch and back at the office ashley proceeded to take shots at her desk.

and the party continued at henrys later that night...

after henrys. yes i made them all go with me to hunt down the portland business journal...but it was for a very good reason! learn about it

the night was full of fun, laughs, and talk of barbed wire tattoos..
ashley - "kendall. dude. learn about how much i love you. probably we should have tattoos on our wedding fingers about something."
me - "um...ashley that might be weird."
ashley - "no bitch it's awesome. cause i'm not talking gross wedding bands. im talking pimped out barbed wire looking kinds...the kinds that stand for cuts. and a small drip of blood by it or something."
me - "oh well in the case..."

on a side note...jake challenged me to an air hockey game.

i was totally dominating...2-0 but then the dude got hella competitive. pissed that he was losing and starting smacking the shit out that puck. well my finger got smashed...and i ended up losing due to injury. but whatever we all know i am better at air hockey so it's fine.

i ended up having to leave before the party was over cause i had to choreography at lake o saturday morning (which by the way...our routine is going to be sick...the S.I.C.K. kind that chelsea uses to describe bleeding love on sytycd.)

so anyway i had to be a good...

but mostly i just love this girl and hate that she is no longer my co-worker. disgusting really.


don't even be grossed out about that word...and if you are, i don't even feel bad at all cause learn about how i had to write an entire article about colons...and it took five hours.

first i am not a doctor so this task wasn't even easy. i had to use fancy words like colonoscopy and malignant and polyps and sigmoidoscopy and barium and fecal and occult and other things. NASTY... but learn about how my entire article was published last friday in the portland business journal! that's right the entire thing!!

of course my name wasn't on it...credit was given to one of the doctors that works for our client...but i conducted the interview, i wrote the story and worked with the editor to get that shit published! (pun was intended...cause i have never talked about so much shit in one day than i did the day i was writing this)

check it out.

also check out the fact that friday, when it came out we left the office before it got here...and so when brittney, jake and i were taking ashley out for drinks to (not) celebrate her last day at the office...i totally made everyone search the city with me to find it. whole foods didn't carry it...but definitely found it at powells! also we were a tiny faded so it made the hunt just that much more fun. ha

anyway, i now know everything about colons and colon cancer...basically i could be a doctor. so if you need to learn about it...contact me.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

the 6th of july

learn about what the 6th of july should really be about.

1. bbqs

the fancy kinds that are coal kind. on sale at fred meyer. and grill the kind of chicken that is called delicious.

2. fire pits

the serious kinds that you make by hand...from "borrowed" pitch forks down the alley.

3. small fire work shows

and by small we mean fucking huge...cutting the house kinds.

thank you fred meyer.
and thank you bretts work for stealing our tanks. only small men and dinos for the battle...

thankfully "fred meyer" had missals for us to launch. and by missals we mean fire balls called roman candles that can dominate small men.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

first fancy dinner in the new fancy house.

i have done cooking a little in the house...i make dinner every night...couple weeks ago danielle came and we made breakfast for dinner...and i have done other small things...allies bday we had tacos, once i made tacos for jill and i...but this dinner i am writing about is delicious for reals dinner...

last week laura came over for so you think can dance, sleepover, and DINNER...good kind of dinner. the kind where i found a delicious recipe, she went to the store and we used pots and pans and even a new pirex pan to cook in!

we made honey mustard chicken, steamed green beans and garlic mashed potatoes. it was amazing yummy scrumptious! the two of us actually make pretty great cooks! we are 2-2 for our fabulous dinner count! so if you ever are in the mood for fantastic food contact laura or i. promise you won't be disappointed.

i know i know...

i still owe grandma movies. its so hard to bring myself to come on computer for significant time when i spend so much of my time on it each day at work. usually when i come home i just like to work out...or pretend to work out (cause most days i am tired or lazy)...cook dinner...watch my best stuff like bachelorette (hella obsessed about it! final next week, learn about it.) and sytycd (learn about tabitha and napoleon and how amazing...)

but yes i will get videos on here soon!

mostly i need to talk about softball and how i played for team r/west finally! it was last thursday...so the blog is a bit over due...but better late than never!!

and not going to lie it was actually kind of fun and i would totally do it again :)...i mean let's be honest, it wouldn't be my number one choice of activity...i could probably think of five other things right now i would rather do. but it wasn't awful..and best part was that i actually did alright!!

i hit the ball every time i was up to bat! i only got on base once...one of my line drives was caught and then i got thrown out at first for a grounder to short stop...but i never struck out and got good hits every time! my fielding probably wasn't as good as it could have been...i believe nick was quoted saying...

"your batting is like you have played lots...but your fielding is like you have never played a sport in your life."

i didn't say thank you cause i wasn't quite sure what that meant...but whatever...

it was good r/west bonding! here are two pictures. both kind of dumb but better than none :)

also nick. our copy writer...he does weekly newsletters about the games. i have always wanted to post it on here...but because i have never played i didn't really ever make sense...but now that i have i can post it! cause i'm in it! so learn about this...they are pretty funny.

The Rag-Tag Bunch

Acting manager Nick knew his team was faced with a tough task Thursday night. After finishing an explanation of the league specific rules to his team, he had this to say. “The effort’s going to be there. But we’re missing about half our regulars, so cohesiveness will definitely be a concern. Hopefully we can gel quickly out there.”
And for one inning, R/West did just that. They held Yahoo to one run in the top of the first before jumping on them with 5 runs in the bottom half while batting through their entire order.
The middle of the lineup implemented what they called “wuss ball.” Nick and Heather, batting #3 and #4 respectively, hit the ball a combined 18 feet in the inning, but both reached safely. Power was found further down the lineup.
Geoff and Kendall – making her softball debut - both hit the ball hard each time they were up. “Well, I’m a natural athlete, so what’d you expect,” Kendall said. Their frozen ropes caught up to them, however. In the 3rd inning, Kendall ripped a liner to left that was caught and thrown back to first for a double-play. Geoff, who was doubled up commented, “I was focused on one thing…scoring. I would have been in easy if the leftfielder wouldn’t have made that nice play.”
Tyler was effectively wild on the mound, keeping the opposition off balance. Kevin, who was cleared to play thanks to a razorblade to the cast earlier in the week, started at 3B for R/West. And Amy played a nice first base, making a dandy scoop on a low throw. “I’m just glad Nick could actually get the ball to me this time,” she said. But not all of R/West was complimentary. “Nick??!?” Jessica groaned. “How many

balls got past him at short? I think he’s allergic to diving. Seriously, my new dog is more aggressive than that…and a lot quieter during the game too.
In the end, the R/West bats went silent. Actually, they were faced with the some affliction that normally haunts them, hitting too many hot shots right at people. After scoring 7 runs in the first 2 innings, they were held scoreless the rest of the way. They lost another game they could have won, 11-7. “Shoulda, coulda, woulda,” coach John Basso said over the phone. “If I was there, we would have won for sure.”
Other notes: Heather Stammer played well in the field. “That’s my girl,” Ma Stammer proudly yelled as Heather made a nifty warning track catch in the 4th inning.
“I knew I had to bring the A game; I couldn’t let my mom show me up,” Heather remarked. A big shout out goes to Ma Stammer for coming out of softball retirement to fill the final spot on the roster. But it wasn’t without controversy. Her “hot bat” and the 6,328 career hits that it’s produced over the years was deemed illegal by the umpire. “Hey, I’m just trying to keep things fair,” he said to the R/West bench.
Big ups also go out to Todd for coming out and playing. With Sean, John, John, and Bern all gone, every guy was put to use. It was a good effort by a team that was thrown together at the last minute. The only real consistency from earlier in the season was Elmer’s continued success in the leadoff spot.
R/West’s slide toward the cellar will continue next Wednesday night, July 2nd, at Delta #4…8:30, with the kickball season opener the following night.
Yep, you read that correctly.